Friday, May 6, 2011

.: Relation ! ? .:



(The clock is ticking 11:00 a.m., the very usual time for school lunch breaks.)

Aman: Hey Anamika!! Come I’m waiting for you.
Anamika: Just two minutes.

And this was the very common scene at 11:00 a.m. in the class of XI when Aman, a commerce student would go and call Anamika, a science student for a round, both taking a break from their group of friends for a while. They used to go far while walking sometimes to the school tuck shop or at times to the school playground. At some of the instances when discussions and gossips were serious than usually were, they would find for a recluse. It was as if the complete school witnessed their friendship be it teachers, students, trees, the air, benches or the blackboards.

Both never shrugged from their duties towards each other. Both never forget the minutest detail of their conversation and never they forget the smallest thing that would bring a smile to each other’s face. Their friendship was not born out of that teen-age crushes or so called infatuation. It is in fact quite interesting to know that their relationship started as enemies, yeah foes. They could not tand each other but this was five years ago. Soon they grew, and as a matter of luck, became close to each other. They became best buddies. They used to share each and everything that happened in their lives. They were part of School Hindi debate team. So they would find excuses in the name of practice and would spend time together. Near the water cooler it was never a normal scene, one of them would definitely be splashing water on other.

Absolutely, such chemistry was not taken as friendship especially when you are at peak of your teens. They were supposedly the most talked about people in the staff rooms and among students too. Both of them knew it very well. But they were talked about among their friends also, it was something both couldn’t digest. And it was then when their relationship came at stake. They never thought that their friends would think so. But the friends had their own reasons. What can two people chat for so long? Why would two people be too close to each other? Definitely something was cooking between the two was their assumption. Ya, it was assumption indeed because they both told their friends that they used to discuss about their girl friend, boy friend respectively. Aman used to ask for what gifts he can gift her, what problems he faces at times and same was the case with Anamika. The only problem came when one of the friends declared that then you are Best friends and both instantaneously said “NO”.

It raised a spurt of questions on them but questions were unanswered. Both knew that their relationship was much above just being “Best Friends” but it is also right that they were not into a relationship that their friends were considering. Both decided to be friends with everyone and stopped talking to each other. But definitely their life was not normal as before. 11:00 a.m. started becoming painful. They started being absent from school. But they were wise enough to be honest to their futures as well. They never let any of this affect the other part of their life. But they decided to leave their friends with a word of advice. And on their farewell day, that is one year down the lane, they played a skit with the help of then Class XI students. And portrayed each and every incident that had happened. They ended the play with the lines “Not every relation is supposed to have a name and certain relationships are definitely Nameless Relationships. Let them be in their pure form because feelings are not the victims of being baptized.”

Today also the in the history of that school, their friendship, the nameless relationship is remembered and revered.

.: Opening the Door .:



As I open the door to begin a new journey I glance over my shoulder to remind myself of the road I traveled to get here, wherever here actually is.
I unknowingly rub my scraped elbow and wince. While I am appreciative of lessons learned I hope to never repeat the same mistakes. I don’t pretend to have a plan, even a concocted one. Things just seem to have worked themselves out so far, not perfectly but not bad either. Conventional wisdom be damned.

On the other side of the creaky brown door lies lush countryside and blue skies. A hill is visible in the distance and a babbling brook runs along the path that will take me there. Leaves strewn about the path are sure to be camouflaging rocks and potholes but I look forward to taking the next step with a smile just the same..

.: feelings .:


You and me,remember
In the month of December
Sitting under that tree
Where'LOVE'was absolutely free
We were together
And romantic was the weather
You were so close
I needed no extra dose
Love was in the air
And i would see you evrywhere
Can't forget your lips,
Rosy red
Which would make even the
Braviest lie dead
I stil remember that amazing kiss
Something none would want
to miss
Through beautiful lands
With my hands in your hands
We went on and on
Till the sun was gone.
Suddenly,
Suddenly,there was
Change in the weather
We were no longer together
Circumstances have betrayed us
Distances have strayed us
I know you are crying
But believe me,'I am trying'
I know you are weeping
But believe me even I'm not sleeping.
Your dream comes,but
Never goes.
Memories are fresh like a
Fresh rose.
Come back,and we'll be
Together
Come back,and romantic
will be the weather
Keep looking at the Moon
I promise we"ll meet soon..



The streets and the paths…
The trees and the flowers…
I miss all those when I am not there…


…when caught on the day one,
Not getting the answers,
I got hold my nerves,
To scribble what I thought…
The board and the chalk…
The class and the bench…
I miss all those when I am not there…


…when to feel the amazement,
In the teachings of the Profs,
I got overwhelmed,
To listen all they talk…
The papers and the marks…
The knowledge and the Profs…
I miss all those when I am not there…


…when meeting the roommates,
My heart did feel ‘awe’,
I ran into excitement,
To enjoy close and far…
The room and the wing…
The hostel and the quad…
I miss all those when I am not there…


…when turned the light on,
And the stage was set,
I couldn’t close my mouth,
To see the beauty of it all…
The shows and the fests…
The SAC and the Audi…
I miss all those when I am not there…


…when asked by THE people,
Where do you see yourself,
I pumped my reply out,
To know the clarity of the future…
The talking and the grooming…
The fun and the work…
I miss all those when I am not there…


…now when I sit my feet crossed,
…my hands on my lap,
…I see everything,
…turning on, turning off,
…the long run to reach,
…the perfect paths to travel,
…every sound of it is silent,
…every bit of it is over,
…the one thing never goes
…&, grows every time,
…yes.. I miss all that,

Yes.. I miss all those…

heartz..

Stung by an unknown bee,

With falling steps randomly;

Tiring, Bleeding, Murmuring to myself…

A drop of blood from my brain to heart;

A hint of sweat from my toe to hairs…

With a trail,

That doesn’t last long, much;

It starts, shatters, walks,

pops, lifts and then dies…

To a path which doesn’t get steps,

With a step which doesn’t make sound;

Sounds of deep slumber…

It doesn’t get heard;

It goes… it comes…

It moves… it jumps…

It talks only to himself;

Though with the loudest thuds,

It doesn’t get noticed…

Doesn’t create attention…

Lacks sensation;

A slumber in peace…

A thought in motion…

A mind in capture…

A heart in prison…….



Its a general one; nothing specific.. read the words, not my mind.. :P

If and only if !

I read this poem as part of my school curriculum. It’s been 13 years now and I remember the page where it was written in the book. The course was over, the poem was well read. The meaning as taught by teachers was well understood but the application was never taught. Some verses are not to be taught, they are there to just to be shown to you. May be that had clicked me sometime in early 2000s when I recalled this poem after someone stated the name of the poem in one of the institute lectures.


IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!


-By, Rudyard Kipling

मेरा लाइफ.. मेरा रूल्स..

Every morning I get up and always think why it couldn't be a sunday????

Even at 9 A.M. I feel myself snuggled happily under the covers just thinking that what if I could take a leave for the day and get some more sleep.But Alas,

IT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN.....

Not bcoz I couldn't take a leave for a day but bcoz, I couldn't take a leave for my whole lyf...
One part of me asks ....Why life has to be so complicated ??Can't we jst leave evrything as it is nd njoy the slow pace of lyf (sitting around,talk'g to friends,watch'g a movie....).

But at the same instant the other part of me stirs up and asks wat would u do being idle???

Wat gud u would do to u and to others if u just stay idle???

It would be easier and happier for me if I stand on one side of this 2 different ends but I know for myself that it's not easy as it sounds and anyways who wants to be on just one end(always good and responsible or always sluggish and irresponsible).I want to be on both sides somedays enjoying life forgetting evrything else and sometimes struggling hard to accomplish my dreamzzzz.

Now that's me unperfect ,I like being so because it makes me feel perfect in some sense.



I think i'm messing it up jst babbling on and on......

But this is how I intend this blog to be containing evrything and anything I feel like sharing....